Jan 21, 2010 11:05 AM
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New York, 5:23 AM
Fri Jul 30
35 posts in the last 24 hours
As Steven Seagal: Lawman nears its season finale, it's pretty apparent Seagal will not be placed in any dangerous situations. But that doesn't mean he can't speak to the camera like he's the baddest man on the force.
I have watched a lot of episodes of COPS. Like...a lot. I am very familiar with how the police officers act on the show. They speak in a straightforward manner, they know their role as a police officer, and most of all, they're humble. Steven Seagal is none of those things! He gets a camera on him, and he is no longer a police officer. He's a kung-fu impossible to kill ninja assassin from his 25th self-produced movie. Spitting such words of wisdom that I'm sure are taught at basic training, like "try to see into the shadows." What!? The man, while he thinks he is the zen-master, is so full of himself it's frightening. Hmm, frightening isn't the word. RIDICULOUS. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking of. Either that or walking joke. But that's two words. Hopefully A&E picks up the series and changes the name to Steven Seagal: Walking Joke.
Oh, but I almost forgot. Don't forget to pick up your very own Steven Seagal: Lawman collector's set! You get a bulletproof vest with Steven's name on it! It's like a jersey... that stops bullets!
Send an email to Mike Byhoff, the author of this post, at mike@gawker.TV.
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